Are you the person who sets clear boundaries? Who isn't afraid to assertively enunciate their "no"? Who vigilantly guards their sphere? Are you able to set forth limits while still being courteous and kind? Have you been in a situation where your willpower has been tested, but stayed firm in your conviction?
Boundaries are the limits we set to protect our mental and emotional well-being.
Boundaries are essential to self-preservation, enabling us to distinguish our individual needs and desires from those of others. Furthermore, it's important to recognize that setting boundaries isn't a sign of selfishness – instead, it demonstrates an awareness of personal limits and the courage to stand firm within them. Establishing firm yet respectful boundaries can help us remain grounded, safe, and fulfilled while navigating life’s experiences.
I was the Yes Girl, and even though I'm older now and striving to become who God wants me to be, it's still sometimes hard to set boundaries. Saying no to a friend can make you feel selfish, even though your refusal may be because you have committed to doing something for yourself. Establishing those lines of limitation can be challenging, but building healthy relationships with yourself and others is essential. That's why it's important to remember that by setting boundaries, we are looking out for our own well-being and everyone involved.
Importance of Setting Boundaries
Boundaries are not easy to set and take practice; it's a continuous process. However, by understanding the advantages of setting boundaries for oneself — such as better mental health and improved relationships with others — one can become more adept at pushing their limits and learning to say "no" when necessary. Setting boundaries also forces an individual to assess their beliefs, values, feelings and opinions, which can lead to further self-discovery and growth.
I recall when a close friend asked me to accompany her to the cinema. Still, I had promised myself that I would use this time productively to pursue my entrepreneurial endeavor. My decision to prioritize striving for success rather than amusement was met with an ambivalence that indicated she did not comprehend my commitment to self-satisfaction - however, verbalizing this rationale sounded selfish and insensitive to me, regardless of how accurately it sums up my sentiment. She failed to comprehend my explanation, as evidenced by her reaction, though I stood firm in my decision.
Setting Boundaries - Self Care
Self-care is a priority that often gets overlooked as we age, but it's never too late to start investing in yourself! In the modern era, being alone has become more accepted and even embraced - going to the theatre alone is common, and getting pedicures or manicures solo can be quite satisfying. Taking time for yourself should be top of your list; living on your terms with only one life is an opportunity not to be squandered. Whether you are just starting in your twenties and thirties or have come to this realization later in life, embracing self-love is worth celebrating.
Learning how to say no without feeling guilty
Allow yourself to live according to what you feel is best for you. Don't let stress and anxiety bog you down; friends should want their pals to be happy, so if that means saying no to achieving that happiness, then do it! As parents, we constantly teach our children how to use their voices, so why not take the same advice ourselves? You can create a safe space to progress confidently by growing and setting boundaries. Challenge yourself to go outside of your comfort zone while also ensuring that you don't overexert yourself beyond what is reasonable - but most importantly, enjoy the process and have fun!
Lastly, you can ensure that your needs and wants are respected by learning how to set boundaries effectively. Setting healthy boundaries is an important part of taking care of yourself and positively affects your mental health and well-being. Self-prioritization should be embraced, as it allows you to pursue what inspires you and help you become the best version of yourself.
I hope this post encouraged you to start setting boundaries and prioritizing yourself. It's not being self but smart.
Thanks for reading!
Arica